Should I play EVE?

Hi, I'm an FPS gamer. Can I play EVE?

You should not play EVE.

FPS games consistently update at around 20 Hz – 140 Hz, which means the server listens to your reactions and updates the game (such as incoming enemies) 20 to 140 times per second.

EVE's play style is like WoW. WoW updates at 65 Hz (the server listens and reacts 65 times per second for all players). EVE updates at 1 Hz. For comparison, Minecraft updates at 20 Hz.

So, how to correctly imagine what playing EVE feels like, and what its server feels like:

Imagine you are playing WoW, and now WoW responds 60 times slower.

Moving to a place will have a multi-second delay. Changing direction will fight with the server tick. Imagine pressing “D” to change direction and waiting several seconds. And pressing “E” for an ability will need multiple presses to make sure it's working.

I'm a spaceship combat enjoyer. For example, in Star Wars Battlefront II I like playing the spaceships. I heard EVE is spaceship combat, which is what I like. Should I play?

You should definitely not play EVE.

I was you: I heard the marketing and came. The main difference between spaceship combat and EVE is that spaceship combat updates at least 20 Hz – 100 Hz (Minecraft is 20 Hz), while EVE updates at 1 Hz – which is entirely unsuited to flying and fighting a spaceship manually. I strongly suspect their entire maintenance is just one $200 server for all players (which is 100% likely).

For the specific feel of playing EVE and flying its ships, check “Hi, I'm an FPS gamer. Can I play EVE?” for server ticks.

Hi, I'm a 20-year-old, very energetic man. Should I play EVE?

You should not play EVE.

In your 20s, you should get real friends, improve your skills and your social life, and make your way out – instead of going into another rabbit hole that will never make you better financially or mentally, and that also sucks up your time (hours per day).

Other details on why you should never play EVE:

1Four chances for swearing – no matter how long you play

It's a game where people can kill you, camp gates, destroy your bodies and form alliances to make their enemies miserable – but no matter how long you play (2 months or 20 years), you have only four chances to swear before you are permanently banned.

That's the entire reason why, when people shoot others down, they type “GF” (get fucked) but never “get fucked” directly.

This also turns the game into a mass individual surveillance system, because you have four chances, and each one increases your ban time:

1. 1 day
2. 3 days
3. 7 days
4. 14 days 4th chance
5. Permanent

They mass-file tickets to get you banned – to get you out, for life.

2Loneliness

You think a game should be designed to let people socialize and have fun, to make people stay longer and pay. You are wrong on this one.

EVE is systematically designed to make you feel isolated and lonely, especially at the start and throughout your career, restraining communication between players. Why?

Their financial gains and triggers (buying game currency with real money, buying skill points with real money) are triggered when you feel hopeless and depressed, and nobody will help you except your credit card.

Combine that with the flaws in how they designed their income: older players will likely have 1,000 billion ISK and never pay the subscription again.

Say you feel hopeless, especially at the start and in the middle: your ship exploded in one of their designed traps, and you have no money to buy a new one, or you can only buy a cheaper ship that makes you earn ISK 10x slower than your previous one. Those situations happen especially with ships around 30M to 300M (the most expensive ships, around 20 of them, are in the 500M – 2B range, but by then you likely have more to cover them). An older player would likely help you with that at no noticeable loss – which kills EVE's entire financial gain built on your depression, failure and hopelessness, so they are likely to kill that.

This is the entire reason:

1. Rookie Help, and every help channel, FORBIDS “financial transactions” (money help). Older players' easy help with money would kill the financial gain they built on your hope, loneliness and failure.
2. They could design much better communication channels to group players, instead of heavily monitored and censored channels (such as forbidding financial transactions) like the Help channels.

Hi, I'm a 60-year-old retired man. Should I play EVE?

Whether you should play EVE really depends on your current situation.

a60 years old, retired, lonely

You are the ideal candidate to play: you are lonely, you have a lot of time for a game, and you have nothing left to chase. Just a reminder: playing EVE will likely make your already lonely life worse, never better.

b60 years old, retired, with a family

You should not play EVE. I know you have a bunch of time you want to burn, and some cash you're willing to throw. But playing EVE will likely kill your back (physically), kill your morale (mentally – destroying your morale so you send more cash to buy ships and services), and raise your blood pressure. You would likely stop having intercourse with your wife, feel deeply depressed for days after your ships are destroyed, care more about a stupid game that wants to suck up your money and time (to keep you an active player), miss the whole chance to watch your granddaughter grow up, and go through personality changes.

Just a reminder: playing EVE will change your personality, drive you away from your family, and never make you better mentally or financially.

I have countless time to waste, and I don't care anymore. Should I play EVE?

You should not play EVE.

There are many ways to get better. Playing EVE will never benefit you in any way – it will make you worse. There is always hope and help. Contact the help lines in your country instead of choosing to make your situation worse.

In general

1Playing EVE will very likely not make your situation better

• Morale: the losses of your ships are intentionally designed to cause low morale (such as depression), so that you buy currency with real money.
• Financially: there is no financial gain from this, except selling bots and real-money trading (which is also a big headache to dive into).

2System design flaw

Old players with around 2 years of knowledge will never pay subscriptions again – no money is gained from them. Old players earn on average around 150M (low) to 500M (high) ISK per hour, which covers their monthly subscription in about 6 to 20 hours of play (500 PLEX at about 6M ISK each, roughly 3B ISK a month).

Solution: target new players

• An intentionally designed lack of tutorials, and traps early on.
• Decrease player communication and interaction, so old players cannot help new players with in-game currency.

  Details: most ships whose loss triggers a new player to pay real money are not expensive – under 200M. An old player earns 200M per hour; for them, helping you is noticeably nothing to lose.

  • Forbid financial transactions across channels (old players cannot help).
  • Decrease communication channels, such as player-owned ones; the limited channels left are heavily monitored.

Outcome for players: lonely→ hopeless→nowhere to learn→ credit card